A day in the life

Big day today. I did something way big. It was somewhere along the lines of getting married and buying a house: I asked for a raise. Yay for me. It was the most difficult thing I've done by far. I was sweating like a man, but that's okay because from what I've read, men get raises. I was told I can expect it after two pay periods. Keep your fingers crossed.

In addition to having an unbelievably rigorous week at work (I actually went to my car and cried during my lunch break because of the stress), I had some pretty funny things happen. Here are some examples:

Scenario #1
Co-worker: I’m out of here. Any plans for the weekend?
Me: Not yet. (Noticing his Hawaiian shirt, shorts and flip flops - he gave his last final) You look like you’re already dressed for the weekend.
Co-worker: You know it, babe! Aha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
The person in scenario #1 is young-ish (in his 40s?) and has a very distinct laugh. I do believe he regretted calling me babe immediately after he said it. Awkward.

Scenario #2
Email from co-worker to me:
"You are not only good looking; you are fine. I appreciate it. Thanks for your help. "
The person in scenario #2 is a very nice elderly man who likes to touch a lot. He suffers from the same ailment my mom suffers from: they think you can't hear them if they're not actually touching you. I was borderline fondled about my arms and hands by this person in the hallway last week. Later in the day I witnessed him administer the same kind of touching to another co-worker. It's innocent (because he is like a grandfather), but it's still work.

Scenario #3:
An hour before quitting time (I had to leave on time today to make a chiropractic appointment) someone came to me for the master key because he locked himself out of his office. I always get a kick from this news because the excuses are phenomenal. Today's excuse: "I grabbed my flash drive by accident instead of my keys." I keep a log now of all the people who lock themselves out of their own offices and plan to give an award at the end of the year for most forgetful and best excuse. I gave him the master key, and when he returned he handed me my key ring with half of the master key. He broke the other half off in the lock. I laughed hysterically and unapologetically for about three minutes as he regretfully explained that he "didn't turn it very hard...it just broke". I watched him call his wife and ask her for a ride home. I called facilities for an emergency locksmith. I lost my master key for good, but it was so worth it.

Also, I counted seven different people in my last half hour at work said, "Any plans for the weekend?" At first, I answered honestly after pondering, "I'm not really sure...I think there's a wine festival in New Town, but it might rain". After the third time, I just laughed at the question, and I didn't care if this was offensive or not. I'm tired of having small talk. I've been doing it all week...for two years straight. I'm willing to bet I'll be nicer to people for a 10% pay increase.