My Big Girl is TEN Today!

Name: Ramona Michelle Hernandez Drueke
Nicknames: Monkey, Ramonkey, Mamomo, The Mona, Face, Girlfriend, Ramoney Baloney
Breed: Boxer - Brindle
D.O.B.: 6/24/1998
Astrological Sign: Cancer
Weight: 65 lbs

1998: Bill Clinton was president. Microsoft released Windows 98 (first edition) on June 25th, the day after Ramona was born. Google was founded in September; the same month I brought Ramona home. Sonny Bono, Frank Sinatra and Phil Hartman all died this year. The Big Lebowski, There’s Something About Mary, Saving Private Ryan and Rushmore were playing in movie theaters. Elliott Smith released XO and Ben Folds Five released Naked Baby Photos. The Agency was recording Monkey in a Spacesuit, an album they never released. Coldplay was formed and Refused broke up. The Detroit Red Wings swept the Washington Capitols in 4 games in the Stanley Cup Finals. My life was about to change forever.

My life at the time: I was working part time at a CPA firm and working towards my BA in Psychology at FIU. I had just received a $3,000 check from State Farm from a rear-end collision to my 1992 Mazda MX3. Instead of actually repairing the car or putting the money in an interest-bearing account, I used the money to purchase frivolous items which included the purchase of a puppy because I was depressed over a break-up and still very stupid. The day I met Ramona she was nine weeks old. I was only supposed to play with her for a short while. When it was time to go, I couldn’t give her back. She looked at me longingly and began to whimper. It was strange how before that moment I had never had a problem giving back another puppy, but this time it was evident that we were meant to be together. I took her home. She wasn’t immediately welcome in our house because we already had a dog, and I inconsiderately failed to get permission to bring another dog home. But over the next day or so, my family grew to love her face and her temperament –it took Joey quite a bit longer. Ramona is directly responsible for bringing joy to me during a very dark era in my life.

The first year: Ramona started off sleeping in my room on a folding bed on the floor. When she was big enough, she started jumping up onto my twin-sized bed. I used to push her off and made her sleep in her own bed. She would wait about one minute, thinking I was asleep, and then try again. I would push her off again. The cycle would repeat itself about ten times, until she gave up…or so it seemed. I would almost always wake up with her on my bed anyway.

Over the years: Ramona survived kennel cough, mange, a hand full of tumors (one of which was malignant) and several Bufo Toad lickings and subsequent poisonings. She was with me when I was mugged in Coconut Grove and never ran away from the corner at which we were before the incident. She briefly dated Larry, a boxer twice her size until he was whisked away to San Diego with his owner. She was with us when we acquired Jake and lost Woody forever. She survived several hurricanes in Miami, including one in which she went 26 hours without going potty because she didn’t want to go outside in the scary weather, and she refused to disappoint us by going in the house (even though we would have understood if she did). She was there to protect Jake from butt-kickings from their evil cousin Lucy, or as we unaffectionately call her, "Lucifer". She was with me when I got married and we all moved away with her new dad. Funnily enough, Ramona and Jake are officially Druekes and I’m still not. That will change eventually.



Deep thoughts: Sometimes I imagine what she would be like if she were human. I imagine her as a 10-year old girl with messy hair and a sassy attitude. I imagine calling home from work and hearing her pick up the phone, chatting away about nothing. She would be starting 5th grade in the fall, probably a big fan of They Might Be Giants, The Agency and Seville (because her dad ROCKS). I would take her and her friends to get their nails done and host sleep overs with pizza and cake, and Chris and I would have to refrain from cussing in front of the kids. I’d buy her sweet peep-toe wedges and cool age-appropriate outfits. She might argue with me, cry and throw tantrums. She might lie and steal. I guess I’m glad she’s a dog. She’ll never judge me or hurt my feelings, and I know that she loves me. Sometimes I wonder if she uses me for food, but she follows me around the house all day the way Jake follows Chris. Sometimes it’s annoying, but mostly it’s endearing. Sometimes I catch her staring at me and I can actually see hearts darting out of her eyes. I hope she knows that I love her as much or more and I don’t even care if she’s an old lady and stinks at times. She’ll always be my first child and favorite girl. Happy Birthday, Big Girl!